with

Mike Bellah

What is it that gives you so much pleasure that you are oblivious to everything else?

A life passion should also transcend mere personal pleasure. It should do something for others too. It should make the world a better place.

Identifying our midlife passion will help us make the big decisions facing us.

What is it that keeps midlifers from premature aging and unnecessary illnesses? What keeps us from becoming sour, dependent, fearful, resentful, disparaging, sarcastic, and isolated? "A midlife passion," says author Mildred Witkin.

Do you have a life passion? How can you identify this all-consuming desire that midlife authority Gail Sheehy says is the source for continuing aliveness in one's second adulthood? Following are some tests that will help.

Sheehy calls it the "Time Flies Test." "What activity do you do where time goes by without your even knowing it?" she asks. Sheehy quotes a 50-year-old grandmother who adds, "Passion is allowing yourself to get lost in something." 

What is it that gives you so much pleasure that you are oblivious to everything else?

Some people will not find the question easy to answer. Having spent the first half of life trying only to live up to the expectations of others--a parent, spouse, children, or boss--they have no idea what really gives them pleasure.

So reflect and experiment. What were the day-dreams of your youth? What have you always wanted to do but were afraid to try? So what's stopping you?

Some authors see a midlife passion as a physical activity like bicycling, playing music, or mountain climbing. But a true passion is more than that; it transcends our activities.

The question is "why do we create music or climb mountains?" Herein lies our true passion. If you learn the answer to this question, you can pursue your passion even if you temporarily lose the ability or opportunity for your activity.

A life passion should also transcend mere personal pleasure. It should do something for others too. It should make the world a better place.

I love communication. Both writing and speaking are activities I can get lost in. But I don't write just for me.

Probably it's because I have always struggled with disappointment myself, but my passion in life is to bring hope to people, especially those who feel most discouraged. 

Similarly, a musician might have the passion to inspire others by bringing beauty and joy into the world; a mountain climber might desire to motivate others to reach for their dreams, and a cyclist might love the camaraderie of friends on the road.

Author Ross Goldstein says that our midlife passion will energize and motivate us and "serve as a guiding force around which to organize our lives." 

This is probably the most practically helpful aspect of our passion. Identifying our midlife passion will help us make the big decisions facing us.

What career should you pursue in your second half of life? What will you do with your leisure time? Where will you live? 

All of these questions can be answered best in light of your passion. What career will best allow you to follow your heart's desire? What leisure will fuel this same fire? What location will best facilitate it?

Do you have a passion in life? If you're not sure, take time today to begin identifying it. Then, pursue it with a whole heart and experience a midlife robustness unknown to your youth.